Name Change?

choi

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发信人: xjxy1213 (xjxy1213), 信区: Parenting
标  题: 因为孩子的名字问题心理堵的慌
发信站: BBS 未名空间站 (Tue Jan 25 12:20:06 2011, 美东)

我家的是双宝,怀孩子的种种辛苦就不提了. 宝宝们的名字是爸爸负责的. 双宝出生前就和LG说过多次我希望孩子的middle name是我的last name, 因为我是家里的独女, 我不奢望孩子们跟我姓, 但是像middle name这种东西可有可无的我原本以为LG会迁就我一下. 可是每次提LG都是含含糊糊的不回答.

让我难过的是,孩子们刚出生,当我还躺在医院的病床上连说话的力气都没有的时候, LG自己不声不响的添SSN的申请表. 就是孩子的first name跟我确认了一下, middle name的事避开不提.拿给我签字的时候我扫了一眼看到middle name写的是孩子中文名的拼音, 当时心都凉了, 突然觉得LG变的很陌生. 伤口还很疼没有力气吵架, 就签字了. 但是心理很难过. 难过的是LG在我最脆弱最需要关心的时候可以这么不顾及我的感受, 一个口口声声说爱我的男人关键时刻就是这么"爱"我的. 美国的护士当时看我们迟迟拿不出名字, 还当这LG的面还说妈妈生的孩子名字妈妈说了算, 唉......

现在事情已经过去几年了, 一想到这件事就心里就觉的很不舒服, 非常不舒服. 跟LG结婚7年吵架无数,绝大部分吵了就忘了. 唯独这件事越想忘越忘不了. 今天上班路上又不小心想到这件事, 还是很生气, 觉得这个男人很小人,虚伪,不地道. 我想这个坎我一辈子都过不去.

怎么才能让自己忘了这件事?

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choi

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(1) Under common law, a person can change his name at will as long as no fraud is intended.

(a) That is how Jesse Ventura,*  Mitt Romney,**  Jeb Bush*** come to be known, despite another name in the birth certificates.

* http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jesse_Ventura
(Minnesota governor, 1999-2003; born James George Janos; He created the stage name Jesse "The Body" Ventura to go with the persona of a bully-ish beach bodybuilder, picking the name "Ventura" from a map as part of his "bleach blond from California" character)

** http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mitt_Romney
(Romney was named after hotel magnate J. Willard Marriott, his father's best friend, and the nickname [Mitt] of his father's cousin Milton Romney, The youngster, who formed a special bond with his father from his first year on, was called "Billy" until he reached kindergarten, when he indicated a preference for "Mitt")

*** http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jeb_Bush
(birth name John Ellis Bush)

I suspect--but am uncertain--that Jeb is after J E B Stuart, a Confederate general in the Civil War.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/J.E.B._Stuart

(b) Under common law, a person can even change his last name. Or parentscan assign a different last name (than theirs) to their children. See

Secretary of Commonwealth v. City Clerk of Lowell, 373 Mass. 178, 366 N.E.2d 717 (1977).
http://masscases.com/cases/sjc/373/373mass178.html

Quote:

"We summarize the stipulated facts, omitting statements of law. Only initials of surnames are given. (1) Mr. C and his wife Ms. G selected the name G for their son in accordance with Spanish tradition. The mother, unable to read English, signed a birth certificate using the name C. One of the defendants recorded the name as C and refused to change it. (2) Mr. B and his wife Ms. S submitted a birth certificate for their son using the name B-S, and one of the defendants refused to accept it. (3) Ms. S. chose the name P-S for her illegitimate son. Without her approval, one of the defendants recorded the name as S and refused to change it. (4) The illegitimate daughter of Ms. G was recorded as G. When Ms. G married the father, Mr. L, five years later, one of the defendants refused to register legitimation unless the child's surname was changed to L, and insisted that the affidavit of paternity list the mother's name as L, although she had not adopted her husband's name. (5) Ms. L was divorced from Mr. L and resumed her maiden name McC. Two of the defendants refused to issue a marriage license to her in the name McC, and she received and used a marriage license in the name L, the name on her divorce decree. She and her husband both took the name McC-M, and a third defendant refused to register the legitimation of their daughter unless the child's name was changed from McC to M. (6) Mr. D and his wife Ms. D selected the surname F for their daughter. One of the defendants refused to accept that name for registration and instead recorded the birth under the name D. (7) Ms. N sought to name her illegitimate daughter D. One of the defendants refused to record the birth in that name.

"2. Surnames at common law. 'It is well settled that at common law a person may change his name at will, without resort to legal proceedings, by merely adopting another name, provided that this is done for an honest purpose.' Merolevitz, petitioner, 320 Mass. 448 , 450 (1946), and cases cited. This principle was recognized by this court very early: '. . . we know not why corporations may not be known by several names as well as individuals.' Minot v. Curtis, 7 Mass. 441 , 444 (1811). 'Where a person is in fact known by two names, either one can be used. This principle has been applied in about every connection.' Young v. Jewell, 201 Mass. 385 , 386 (1909), and cases cited. Numerous authorities in other jurisdictions are in accord.

(2)
(a) Sam Roberts, New Life in U.S. No Longer Means New Name. New York Times, Aug 26, 2010.
http://www.nytimes.com/2010/08/26/nyregion/26names.html?scp=1&sq=name%20change%20court&st=cse
(b) Letters to editor: When Immigrants Took New Names.  New York Times, Sept 3, 2010.
http://www.nytimes.com/2010/09/03/opinion/l03names.html?scp=2&sq=letter%20name%20court&st=cse
("Yet it is important to note that name changing in civil court has historically been a practice of native-born Americans, not immigrants")

My comment: This is because in US, the person being naturalization can take any name he chooses.

(3)  
(a) In Massachusetts if a baby is born in a hospital, there is no more form to fill by hand; everything is done electronically.

(b) In Massachusetts, a birth certificate need not be filed right away. Further, it can be amended.

Amendments, Corrections, and Delayed Records. Registry of Vital Records and Statistics, (Massachusetts) Department of Public Health, undated.
http://www.mass.gov/?pageID=eohhs2terminal&L=4&L0=Home&L1=Consumer&L2=Basic+Needs&L3=Vital+Records&sid=Eeohhs2&b=terminalcontent&f=dph_vital_records_c_amend_corrections&csid=Eeohhs2

(3) If at present your husband and you can agree on the name change, go to the court and it is easy.

The rub is when your husband refuses to go along after these years.

rub (n): "OBSTRUCTION. DIFFICULTY <the rub is that so few of the scholars have any sense of this truth themselves — Benjamin Farrington>
www.m-w.com

Nicole Askin, How do I Change a Name in Massachusstts?   eHow.com, Sept 3, 2010.
http://www.ehow.com/how_6892203_do-change-name-massachussetts_.html
("If parents disagree over what name their child will have, the courts will decide the issue based on what is in the best interests of the child")

My comment: eHow has similar page for each state. But probably the principle is the same. If parents can not agree on the name change of their child--years AFTER birth certificate was filed--a judge will decide. It probably matters not which parent gets custody.


【 在 choi 的大作中提到: 】
: 发信人: xjxy1213 (xjxy1213), 信区: Parenting
: 标  题: 因为孩子的名字问题心理堵的慌
: 发信站: BBS 未名空间站 (Tue Jan 25 12:20:06 2011, 美东)
: 我家的是双宝,怀孩子的种种辛苦就不提了. 宝宝们的名字是爸爸负责的. 双宝出生前就和LG说过多次我希望孩子的middle name是我的last name, 因为我是家里的独女,
: (以下引言省略...)

--

choi

本文通过一路BBS站telnet客户端发布

(1) The eHow piece, though plausible, does not cite any court decisions.

I find a wonderful web page:

Case Law on Name Change in Maryland. The People's Law Library of Maryland,
undated.
http://www.peoples-law.org/node/1012
(When parents do not agree on changing a child’s name
•West v. Wright, 263 Md. 297, 283 A.2d 401(1971);
•Lassiter-Geers v. Reichenback, 303 Md. 88, 492 A.2d 303 (1985);
•Lawrence v. Lawrence, 74 Md.App. 472, 538 A.2d 779 (1988);
•Dorsey v. Tarpley, 381 Md. 109, 847 A. 2d 445 (2004)
•Schroeder v. Broadfoot, 142 Md. App. 569, 790 A. 2d 733 (2002))

Note: Click "About" tab in the top horizontal bar, and one will see, "
Maryland's Peoples Law Library (PLL) is a legal information and self-help
website maintained by the Maryland State Law Library, a court-related agency
of the Maryland Judiciary, and supported by Maryland's non-profit legal
services providers."

(2) Yesterday when I left library where I gain access to internet, I thought
the best way to appease your husband--and potentially the judge--is to add
another name (whether you call that another middle name makes no difference)
to your child's name--or children's names, for you say they are twins.

You see, George Herbert Walker Bush has four words in his name. He has
stated that he considered himself--and was known as--George Bush, UNTIL his
son George Walker Bush was elected president in 2000. To distinguish himself
from that son (Jeb Bush has been rumored to have the timber, if not
ambition, of president), he accepted George H W Bush coined by others.*

* Another interesting fact about another president's name.
Harry S. Truman
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Harry_S._Truman
(His parents chose the name Harry after his mother's brother, Harrison Young
(1846–1916), Harry's uncle. His parents chose "S" as his "middle name" in
an attempt to please both of Harry's grandfathers, Anderson Shipp Truman and
Solomon Young [both had S as the first letter]. The initial did not
actually stand for anything, a common practice among the Scots-Irish)

So you ask your husband to add your last name as the forth word in the child
's name. By doing this, you may encounter less resistance from your husband.
Once both parents agree, a judge will not oppose.

The catch is you child may not use it (either middle name). Then again
Geroge HW Bush did not take up either of middle name until old age. In the
end, it is up to your child, who can adopt any name (first, middle, last) he
or she likes.

【 在 choi 的大作中提到: 】
: (1) Under common law, a person can change his name at will as long as no fraud is intended.
: (a) That is how Jesse Ventura,*  Mitt Romney,**  Jeb Bush*** come to be known, despite another name in the birth certificates.
: * http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jesse_Ventura
: (Minnesota governor, 1999-2003; born James George
: (以下引言省略...)

--